New Year, New Boy time

Merry Chrostmas and Happy new year.
It’s finally a new year and time for more conundrums and shenanigans in the life of me.
So being a new year I decided to ditch doucjebag and forget about him. I implemented a 3 strike policy. First strike was lost when I was at his house and everyone left. Perfect opportunity for something to happen but no I slept in his brothers bed by myself. Second and third strike were lost at Phillip island. So now I forget about him.
New Years was spent and my 2 besties thought that I was in with a chance as the after party was at mine. Well he wasn’t in my bed, but someone completely different and left field. I’m going to call him the lawyer guy because he is a lawyer. Very left field as no one not even myself saw it coming. I had finally put people to sleep and I was looking for him and there he was passed out into bed. Not on any particular side but in the middle. At least with doucjebag he chose a side. So I slipped in on my side using my nursing techniques to roll him and telling him to wake up and climb under the covers. He follows suit and then snuggle up close.
My inner me is going I can deal with this I don’t need to hook up with him, snuggling is simple.
Bah baum, soon the hands start trailing his that is at this point I’m still hoping to get some sleep. Because I’m wearing a jacket he had difficulties getting to my dress and I don’t think until a bit later he noticed my bra was a stick on. So I go to the bathroom and do a finally check to make sure everyone is alright and take off my jacket because on keeping my dress on so I don’t do anything silly and we were just spooning. I get back and bam there he is naked. I was like wtf are you doing please put some clothes on at least your jocks and stop tempting me. Get back to bed his hands start wandering and then they move lower, my hands move them back up, hands down, I move them back down and the game repeats.
Then I told him I’m not going to bang him or give him head cause i have rules he said that’d be fine just relax.
So what have I found out, that I can’t snuggle with boys because I’d hook up with them I don’t know if it’s a win or lose situation.

Conundrum time

It’s been many moons between my posts, a lot has happened but once again douche bag is in the picture well the one I have been hooking up with.
The conundrum was produced last night after discussing with my friend and his friend the situation. She was like youve been hooking up for a year what’s happening. My reply we still hook up. She didn’t really like that answer and it got me thinking.

1. We have been hooking up for a year and we continue to hook up does this mean he likes me.
2. Everyone knows we have been hooking up and are making fun of it. It seems there’s a bit of pressure to be on a relationship
3. I’m starting to do what I do when the pressure of a relationship happens and that’s to freak out. It’s in my head that it always has been casual but now I’m over thinking
4. Say we get into a relationship and it goes wrong ill loose my best boy friend as his besties with him
5. Do I have feelings for the bestie as he is the only person I can’t and won’t sleep with because I know it will fuck with my head
6. I don’t really know much about douchebag except that he likes to drink and is smart as he has a university thesis.

Holy moley over thinking to the max

Douchebag 99

A trip to Adelaide on the weekend caused a bit of a stir not only on my love life but drama in general. Lets be honest whenever there is a trip away of course there will be drama and for once it didn’t even involve the douchebag I’ve been hooking up with.
So the story goes if you flick back to my posts a whole year ago you will have heard of another douchebag I was seeing a boy who stole my heart. Where does he fit into this seeming a whole year has past and maybe in the last 3 months I’ve forgotten about him finally?
Well Saturday getting ready for a party my friend and I are at a petrol station. My phone beeps and it has written party party party. Now who would write this? It’s a number I don’t know. Is it someone who is at this party? Who is it? Does douchebag have my number finally? Well the answer is no no no. It was from the boy of a year ago. Like wtf? So I freak out a little but I don’t reply. Points for me on this. But then he has the nerve to Facebook message. Drunk me was not a happy chappy. Plus I was super pissed that someone had stolen my captains and coke.
So where does this leave me? In no mans land I want to message him but I don’t. I don’t know what to do?????
Boys enough said???

Boy oh boy

It’s been a while since I’ve done a boy post. Perhaps boys haven’t been on my mind, well that’s a bit of a lie.
Though there is one boy in particular who is not on my mind but bam his there and when we drink bam something always happens. His not even a new boy, I hooked up with him as a rebound and there have been occasions where we hook up for example when we drank in latvija and the event that has caused me to write this was last weekend. I thought our hook ups were secret until I found out our crew know.
I went down with some friends to the island, I was crashing a boys weekend but I needed to get away. I got there, started chilling and bam he arrives. That’s alright I’m cool calm and collected. Until its about time to go to bed, it was already morning. I was absorbing the quietness outside whilst having a sneaky smoke, went in and got a glass of water and he was there. He pretty much went hey I know your not ok, what’s up. I was like I can’t tell you or I cry, he came to give me a hug and said come with me. New me was like no I’m going to my own bed. He promised nothing has to happen its just nice to have comfort. So alas I followed. And did nothing happen? Of course not because like always we started hooking up. And then the drunken ramble came up. Would I have slept with him? Yes but he didn’t have protection- he seems to lack on the organisation front there. And what annoys me is that he knows how to turn me on and even says I remember this how you like it.
We fell asleep, and then I must’ve had a bad dream or something because his holding me reassuringly. That’s where my mind starts to tick, he never does that when we sleep together, why now, because I’m being emotional or as one of my friends said that he has feelings.
Firstly he can’t have feelings, he was my rebound that’s why I am comfortable hooking up with him.
Secondly he is a man whore, I’ve seen him hook up with other girls and there’s no hard feelings.

Then what got me in the morning when I went to my bed to get some sleep, he was reminiscing about the first time we hooked up. Who does that?

I’ve debriefed with my girls, one said his got feelings. The other said she knew it was going to happen. Then I spoke to my guy friend and his like the guys a bit of a dick, I don’t want him to hurt you.

It’s just another different path in the life of me. There’s bits of old me coming through again which I’m not liking.
I guess we will see what happens on Saturday when I see him again.

The luck or the unluck of the Irish

It’s clear that this trip my ideal holiday romance fantasy didn’t occur, but looking back on the time seeming my trip is coming to an end, it is clear what sort of boy has tickled my fancy.

The winner: The Irish. I don’t know if it’s their curly hair aka Bilbo Baggins, or their humour aka prague pub crawl guy, or just cause their a friend. But certainly it is the accent except for my friend he only gets to be Irish because his family is from Ireland. But you get talking to me in that Irish accent and bam I’m putty in their hands, plus I’ll probably make fun of them and make them say potatoes or call them Bilbo Baggins or say that they are leprechauns. But my time with the Irish have been fun times. Bilbo Baggins because he was my pub tour guide person, I feel that’s a bit of an achievement, my regret is not going home with him but that was probably a wise choice any way.

My friend, it was just a drunken hook up and snuggle at mine and my travel buddys house party. Just a bit of fun.Like I said he only gets counted by default because of heritage.

Pub crawl guy in Prague was chivalrous and offered me a seat, I declined, then found out he was irish and started making fun of his accent, and talking about leprechauns. We hooked up at the next bar after I made fun of him again for drinking a vodka raspberry.  Why would a guy drink a vodka raspberry, I do not know, but in my rule book that is only for private time or if out in public you disguise it with coke and drink a manly spirit like whisky something I wouldnt like but you could score extra points on the machoness.

 

Spot number 2 was the English, the ones who  bought me down with truthfullness and fucking over but oh well.

 

Anyway when I get home, my mission will be to find an irishman who can swoon me with his accent or at least I can only dream right?

 

Sex shows, Space Cakes and a 21st

What do the first two things have in common???? Yes that’s right, Amsterdam. The town of sex, marijuana and fun times.

We arrived in Amsterdam after a visit to a classic clog and cheese factory. Turns out clogs aren’t my thing, but cheese is, its just a shame that I don’t have any room in my backpack to take some cheese home with me.

Arriving in Amsterdam, we were staying in what is actually advertised as the Worst Hostel- Hans Brinker. Yes it seemed that we were all squished in our dorms and the shower wasn’t even a shower but they had a nice happy hour of 2 for 1 on anything. Who can complain with that? After a quick walking tour, we were told to go off and find dinner and then be prepared for the sex show in the red light district.

We found dinner but lets be honest, I didn’t really want dinner. What I wanted to do was find what Amsterdam is famous for. A Coffee Shop. Now I have only dabbled in pot smoking, if anyone asked me where to buy it, I would have no idea, or how to roll a joint. So the safest option I thought was to indulge in a Space Cake. You walk into the coffee shop and are presented with 2 menus, one showing legit food and drink and the other menu, the type of pot you want. So I bought a space cake, we got told to go half and wait an hour before it hits. We split the cake into halves and eat our cake and wait. If our timing was correct, the giggles should hit us in the middle of the sex show. So off we go to the sex show with the top deck group.

The Sex Show was in the middle of the red light district, it was interesting seeing the working girls just sitting in their window waiting for business. We get into the show and were granted prime seating but I was also surprised that people went to these shows because they actually enjoy it and take it quite seriously. I was going in open minded all for a bit of fun, unsure of what to expect, but I was happy I was sitting behind the bar, far away from the stage. The first act came on, a stripper lady dancing away, then boom, she sticks a candle up her hoo ha, and lights it on fire. It was crazy and I and my friend were a bit like WTF???? Next act on comes an army stripper. She dances and strips. By this time I was seeing a lot of boobs and naked bodies. She then grabs one of the boys from our top deck group, puts him on the floor, this time instead of a candle, she puts a pen up there and writes all over this guys body. I’m sure the guy loved it, who can say that they had a stripper write on them. The next actt involved another stripper, this time grabbing the asian guy from our group. Now this asian guy, it was clear he was a virgin and had never touched a woman before yet probably seen them naked. He was surprised when she told him to take off her panties. Then she went and tied him up with string coming from her hoo ha. There was a lot of string. The fourth act was a couple act and was probably the most awkward too watch. It was clear she wasn’t enjoying it. Blow jobs by the girl was given to the guy, then she rode him and then there was anal.  To me anal is a no no and it was clear she wasnt enjoying it and it just seemed to go on forever. The last act was probably the most funniest but also awkward. A. it was funny because my travel buddy got pulled on stage. Yes, she was on the stripper stage. But not only her, another girl, guy and the asian guy. My travel buddy was all like Im out of her, when the stripper was pointing to the stripper pole, then she made her dance with her and when she placed her hands on her boobs my friend was like im out of here and went off stage. For the rest of the night I teased her that she touched a strippers boobs- just a tad immature. The rest of the act went ahead and the stripper pulled out a banana. She placed a piece of banana on her boob and made the other girl eat it. For the boys, the first boy ate the banana just off her stomach, our lovely asian boy ate the banana, from you probably guessed it already but her hoo ha. And that concluded the sex show. It would be something I wont be doing again I reckon but what was also dodgy was that we must have had a dodgy space cake because we were feeling no effect.

So my travel buddy and I went in search of another coffee shop, but this time to buy a joint. We found one and looked like idiots as we decided which one to buy, I thought I was tough and that we should have one each. Wrong decision, we are quite weak or responsible and we shared the joint, but we knew our limits and didn’t even finish the joint. My high would come in waves, there were giggles, I would feel normal, then everything would be in slow motion. My friend had the giggles but she didn’t enjoy it as much as I reckon I did. Well thats the end of our first night in Amsterdam and dabbling in marijuana smoking, which is something I don’t condone on a regular basis.

The next day was a rainy day in Amsterdam but my best friend and travel buddy’s 21st. We did a bicycle tour of Amsterdam in the rain with our guide singing happy birthday to her, and then went and had a morning hot chocolate with baileys because the drinking had to begin, but followed by a nap. We then went to the bar for more drinks and made our way to dinner which was a floating Chinese restaurant. Before that of course we had a mojito on a floating bar. The chinese was alright, the hostess thinking my friend was turning 18 not 21  gave her an elephant candle. It was nice. Our night was starting with a canal cruise and unlimited beer and wine which was used to a good extent. Though this time for once I wasn’t abusing it, I was getting a cold and actually feeling quite dreadful but I had to be there for my friend and be the one to pour drinks down her throat. After the canal cruise we went to a bar where there was a live gig, they sang another happy birthday, jaeger bombs were drunken and then we lost the top deck group, turns out they went to a club and forgot about us. We found the club but it was pretty packed and shitty so we bailed, had some mojitos at another bar and went off to another bar. A bar where our top deck group was at. We had found them again, this bar was cool, plus we got free shots for my friends birthday, and the music was alright to dance too. It was a nice last night with top deck and for my friends birthday. How many people can say that they celebrated their 21st in Amsterdam?

the next day in hungoverness we said goodbye to top deck and our friends, and crawled back into bed to plan the next adventures

Stranded on an island in Dubrovnik

We arrived in Dubrovnik after an eventful journey. The eventful journey being 12 hours on a bus, not that I can complain seeming I have done 30 hours on a bus, but that was a moving bus going places. These 12 hours were mainly spent stationary. From waiting 2 hours to cross the Albanian border into Montenegro. Then another 2 hours to exit the border of Montenegro then 3 hours with overtaking a not moving line into the Croatian border. Arriving at the Croatian border and handing over our passports, three people where told to get off the bus. Our bus driver had to unload the baggage so they could get their bags. It was also at this point where knowing my bladder with my high blood sugar levels had reached breaking point of needing to pee, decided that it had enough of me waiting so I had to pee in the bus toilet which was a big no no. Also lucky I didn’t get chosen to remove my bags imagine having to explain why I had random needles in all sorts of places in my bag.
Though we did and we arrived in Croatia. The next day we were keen to get our explorer shoes on plus it was a sunny day what could go wrong. Having enjoyed Brac we decided it would be a good idea to visit the island Lokrum, a 15 minute ferry ride away. Hopping on the boat, book in bag so I could read in the sun, it was a tad cold to swim it was time to set sail. We caught up with a few people when we reached the island and decided to go to the watering hole, it was a lake in the middle of the island filled with salt water. I even went for a bit of a dip, but I got a bit cold and escaped to dry off and read my new book ‘Ladies and Children First’. This was we’re I saw grey clouds looming forwards. I ignored this until my friend hopped out and I said I think a storm is brewing. 2 seconds later literally the thunder rolled. We were like oh shit we should find shelter. On our walk to the watering hole and near the boat depot there was a restaurant that seemed sheltered. At this point it had started to rain, so we dashed. I was wrong, there was no shelter, the shelter being umbrellas that were now pulled down. Our next option was the info centre. The rain was pelting harder, the thunder louder and there was lightning. I was a bit scared. I hate thunderstorms as it is. Well the rest of the island had the same idea to shelter in the info centre so we were left outside under a tiny bit of roof to the side of the building. I couldn’t even remember safety precautions of what to do in a thunderstorm but I’m sure standing outside one isn’t safe. With a towel that we were both sharing led us to think how the fuck were we going to get off this island. Certainly it wasn’t safe to sail. So here we were stranded on an island and no one had any idea how we were going to get off, when we were going to get off, even better when the rain was going to stop.
What had seemed like an eternity but really was an hour someone had said they had seen a boat, so me and my friend thinking that we are wet anyway headed off to the pier. Lucky we did, because there was a boat on the way, and everyone was headed towards it. But we ended up on it, a bit like my book, ladies and children first. Drenched and miserable a bit because I hate being wet, it was time to find somewhere to eat and a warm drink.
Time for adventure number 2: our search for food. We saw people from our tour leave a restaurant saying that they just ate in a souvenir shop. What an experience, and the man was beckoning us in. It was the first time I can say that I’ve eaten my lunch in a souvenir shop. It was also a delicious lunch, I pigged out on lasagne and pizza and a hot chocolate. Then the man asked if we could hurry up because we were only a table of 2 sitting on a 6 person table and he had 6 hungry people waiting. So wolfing down our food we went back to our hostel to nap to prepare for a night out.
The first club was alright with cocktail buckets, the second club was just not our scene so we ended up at an Irish pub which turned into quite a pattern well only in Prague when we bailed on seconds clubs.

Places I have slept

This is a quick post to describe the type of accommodations and range of nights sleep I have had throughout these 12 weeks. It turns out to be quite a list in no particular order.

1. Park benches: after arriving in Split at 4am, we were unable to check in and sleep, so we dropped off our nags at Golly and Bosi and trekked up a look out to watch the sunrise and slept a few hours on park benches until it got a bit hot we moved to park benches in the shade.

2. Ferry: the first ferry ride from Split to Ancona I bought air seats because I heard deck would mean no seats and floor. It must have been and empty ferry that day as we were able to spread out on the air seats and had the whole room to ourselves.
The next time was traveling with top deck from Ancona again but this time to Plataria in Greece. We got given dorms and I was asleep on the top bunk. The vibrations of the ship made me think I was on a cellulite burner but it put me to sleep.

3. Train: a train from Amsterdam to Prague. I was also sick. We had no chairs at all and pretty much had to lie flat for the next 12 hours. Lucky I was on a bottom bunk I wouldn’t have known how I would’ve survived the second bunk or even the third bunk on top. Not a very comfortable sleep.

4. Bus: a 30 hour bus ride from Riga to Budapest, you had to sleep or you would’ve gone crazy. Lucky again I was able to spread my legs and lie across 2 seats for most of the journey.

5. Hostels: fro, squeaky beds in Prague to king singles in Berlin to little dens in Split at least there was always a roof over my head.

My favourite place I would have to say I’ve slept other than my bed would’ve been Prague even if the beds did squeak but they had doonas plus a warm shower.

Greece: sun and sailing

It was time yet again to be in transit. We hopped onto another overnight ferry from Ancona but this time to Plataria. The ferry ride was a bit more comfortable this time as we had beds instead of chairs. The chairs were comfy but having a bed is a lot more comfortable. It was also interesting this time the amount of people who had deck tickets. There were so many inflatable beds in the aisles and everywhere you walked around. It literally looked like they were boat people.

Arriving in Plataria we were split into boat crews and also we came to the realisation that the town does not have an atm.Turns out that a captain wasn’t going to man the boats but us. I have had zero experience but as a team called as one girl had put it the tittie committee or the more polite version boat 8, we were given an intro and then set sail. Sailing was very pretty. Our first stop of the night after sailing a few hours was somewhere starting with S. It was at a private resort with watersides and a bar. It was also the place where the nearest ATM was a 20 minute drive. Having only 5 euros in my wallet I needed money desperately. So me and a group of us hopped into the tray of a ute and travelled the 20 minutes to an ATM. Arriving back it was time for some tea which was chicken gyros and time to start partying. It was a night of crazy partying, once again there were people dancing in the bar, showing their tits for free drinks and having peopledo body shots off them. Then we went for a swim sans tops. That was my extent of nakedness. Heading back to my boat, I met with 2 of my crew who were fuming. Turns out 2 people had gone onto our boat into these girls rooms and had sex. It wasn’t their boat even, the claim being I didn’t know which boat I was on didn’t really work. Lucky it wasn’t my room but I as always am a messy person so the room and bed was a mess. I guess it’s lucky that I am messy sometimes. More people went swimming in the sea naked but that’s not my scene.

The next day as the sex on a boat saga disappeared we sailed to Corfu. Though our first stop was a random island for water sports. Water sports not really being my thing, I just sat on our boat in the sun sun baking and reading and getting burnt. Sailing for a few more hours we arrived in Corfu, but it wasn’t the party side of Corfu, it was the deserted fishing side. We did see a donkey though, took some selfies. This dinner was one of the worst I’ve had, the calamari was so chewy and overlooked and the Asian guy said it was the worst steak he ever had. The place did redeem itself though by showing us some Greek dancing. We danced like the Greeks and also watched as they danced with a table in their teeth and in a ring of fire. It was pretty cool. This night there were no boat dramas but we were told to be wary of the Greek fisherman as they were a bit sleazy.

The next day it was time to sail back to Plataria and spend a night at that dock. It was good having the sun, sailing with sails, jumping into the water from the boat. It was an amazing experience. It was just a shame I didn’t get to see the Mamma Mia style houses which is what I imagined all of Greece to be about. But you can’t have everything

Italy: bringing me back to reality

The first day of the tour was interesting. A group of 5 of us had become the newbies as we joined the group of 40.
We did a quick walking tour of Rome. I saw the Coliesium. I had my picture taken in front of it and was able to see the African sellers coming up to you and offering their offerings of bootleg Gucci bags, umbrellas and hats. From the Colleseum we became wrapped up in Hare Krishna parade all the way to the roman ruins and the Trevi fountain. I threw a coin into the fountain, I didn’t want to more than one and end up married, so because I have thrown my one coin in it means I will return to Rome. It’s a city I wouldn’t mind exploring because we didn’t have much time to explore it, so on my next adventures it will be on the list of things to do. We then went off to buy some gelato, there is a store with over 150 flavours but the line was massive and it was a hot day and we all wanted to just cool down and eat some ice cream. We found some gelato and made our way back to the Camping ground to meet the rest of the group but only after we stopped a little girl from pick pocketing this girls bag on the tour.It was a bit daunting meeting everyome as it seemed that cliques had already been made. But we tried our best by attending the ABC (anything but clothes) party wearing bed sheets as togas and playing flip cup, a game I had heard being played the night before because they play it really loudly. Partying was fun and dancing the might away, drinks were drank and I hooked up with an English boy. This is where things got a bit messy because drunk me decided that we were going to have sex and then drunk me backed out. English boy bought me back to reality saying that just because I got screwed over by one boy doesn’t mean that I have to hurt other boys because I’m not only hurting myself but them too because it turns out boys have feelings. He also said that one day I will probably regain boys trust but take it slow and find myself first. What this boy said is true, and we discussed things like that lying in the road looking st the stars. Though when I did get back to my villa which he accompanied me home to I burst into tears with my friend. I think it just hit home, someone pulling me back to reality and popping me fro, my self absorbed bubble.

A few days later we were back in the land of Italy but this time in Venice. It was a bit of a long day after driving most of the day from Zadar to Slovenia to Venice. In Venice we were back at a camping place with a pool and another party place. The first night there was going to be a pool party. I had heard some bad news about a friends father who passed away from cancer so I got a bit teary thinking about that and my friends mum too who is suffering from cancer so I went into a bit of my defense mode which is smoke a lot of cigarettes and drink. My friend and I were on the steps drinking when we heard that there were going to be free shots, so off we dashed to the bar for the free shots which was shots poured into our mouths. Getting our free stand having that pre drink buzzer went and drank some more and danced the night away. There was no boy contact that night. The next day with a bit of a hangover we explored Venice, the sinking city or the city of love. We had a bit of a walking tour and saw St Marks square, then went to a lace making demonstration. Gondola riding even though I was in Venice I decided to decline and just get let in the city turning down streets and alley ways getting lost. It was nice strolling the streets and seeing the masquerade masks which scare the shit out of me but also the jewellery and glass were from the island of Marino. The only bad thing about the day was that we had to wait till 4pm for the bus to come back and collect us seeming that no transport is allowed in Venice. I did ride on a vaperetto taxi, it was the worst experience ever. It was so squished that I was getting groped from all over. Arriving back it was time for a party again and it was alright to be hungover on the bus as we had a long ride to Munich the next day. So drinks were drank, danced to a dodgy coverband. Me being drunk and losing my lighter I decided to go play the lighter trick on these boys. So we went up, asked for a lighter then got talking. Asking the traditional questions of a traveller I was surprised when they said they were from Latvia. So our conversations turned into Latvian conversations. They were surprised to find Latvian people as much as we were. It was crazy. Though back to partying, the partying continued, tops were being taken off in public places, and yes I even took off my top only because every time I tried to button up my blouse the girls would just rip it off. And then bam I find boy number 2. Must be something about Italy but he was from Adelaide anyway. Drunk me once again was like I will have sex with you. So I told my roomie give me 20. She went off with the Latvians and I went to our villa, we made out and then as we were going to do the deed I asked if he had protection . The answer was no, so he said you wait there and I’ll come back. Well I can bet you a billion dollars on what happend. He didn’t come back. Me being bought back to reality yet again. And you would think I would’ve learnt from Rome but nope, I was pretty wrong.
In a semi positive note I got my tarot cards read by this Asian guy on our tour. I asked him about health and he read that the cards I picked included diabetes, and for some reason my bladder and that one day there will be a cure. But of course we all know that that is a long way away.